Merry Christmas and Happy New Year 2017!

Our second Christmas spent in San Diego, and our first in our new home, is a wrap! Having a four year old little boy during this season has got to be the most fun thing ever. Philip and I have been living in a state of constant nostalgia this month. All of the special holiday moments from decorating the Christmas tree, making sugar cookies, to watching his sweet brown eyes lighting up as he opened his gifts, and reading the Christmas story to him as he is all snuggled next to me in his new cozy pajamas (that we made him open as his Christmas Eve present...the worst tradition for kids ever. But he was actually really excited so I'm pretty sure he's not my kid after all....)

All of the happy holiday vibes aside...has this not been a crazy year? I feel like we've all felt some sort of pain in 2016! Individually and collectively. Yes, there was lots of good. Personally we've had some of our sweetest and precious moments happen this year. So many pivotal transitions, beautiful memories, fun trips, great friends. We've also experienced some of our most stressful and low times. It has definitely been a year to remember and it has really set the stage for this next one.

Collectively we've seen so much crazy stuff going on in the world this past year, thanks in part to the power of social media, we've seen so much good and a bit more bad. I think I'm safe to say on behalf of many of us that we're ready to jump into 2017 fully expectant of a year very different than the last. Full of personal and collective overcoming, of being part of a much bigger picture as we are all important pieces to a beautiful puzzle. A year of embodying and perpetuating grace and mercy which propels us to progress. 

Here's what I am praying for - that 2017 will be a year filled with peace that we have never known before. That breakthrough after breakthrough would happen in this new year. Not only in our family, but in your family. Because when one of us has breakthrough it has a trickle effect. One person effects so many others. When Philip and I succeed - so do so many others because our lives touch others. And vice versa.

I pray that this new year would bring the relief of suffering for so many across our world. That the brightest minds would rise up with creative solutions to our country and world's issues. That we would all focus on what we have in common with each other and not our differences. That "loving our neighbor" isn't just a sign we hang in our homes but a truth that becomes etched on our hearts as we go about every single day of this new year. That we would regain at least a sliver of our child like faith and wonder and love. That's my prayer for myself and our city, nation and world.

Here are a few of my favorite images from this past month.

Love to you all. God bless you in this new year!

-Esther 

If you had to choose one word

...what would your word for 2016 be?

We've signed on the dotted line. I bought *real* cups and plates. Pots and pans too. Yep, it's official. After almost two years of living life here, there, and everywhere Phil and I are excited to begin what we're affectionately calling "Chapter 4" of our lives as a family.

The last few years living on the road has been the most crazy, stressful, exhilarating season of my life thus far. It was jam packed with fun, adventures, any and every emotion you can think of, blessings and filled with friends - new and old. This crucial leg in our journey has taught us so much about what following God’s leading really looks like. I’d say the biggest lessons we’ve learned (not mastered) are that we, as a family, need to strive for flexibility, for living with purpose and passion, for doing whatever we need to do to give up all that we have for Jesus. These are lessons we’re thankful for and we're committed to continue learning as we start this new chapter.

The decision to commit to San Diego has been one of the more sure and peace filled decisions we’ve made in the past few years. We’re excited to be here for as long as God leads.

Phil and I were talking yesterday, as we sat on the floor in our new, empty of things and full of potential, apartment, about words that could be used to describe this new chapter of our lives starting ironically on December 31st. After throwing around “commit”, “deepen”, and “consistent” (all of which are powerful words and ones that are resonating with us as we begin this new year in a new place with a new lifestyle), the word hit me - Focus. 

We want to be FOCUSED. It's not how many people we can meet or places we can go or projects to do. It's about focusing on what God has and wants us to be investing our time, energy and resources into in this new stage of life and this new year.

We've unpacked our suitcases, hung our clothes in the closet, have pretty new pinstriped sheets on our oh-so-cushy new bed. It's been a relief to be in our own place - yet I'd be lying if I didn't say that I get a sort of mini-panic when I look around and realize we actually need to invest in furniture and other home stuff that we haven't used in what feels like - ever.

Any-whooooo -  since we don't have much furniture at this point (yes, I'm blaming this) I've found myself hanging out on the bed quite a bit more than I should most days...the light in our room and the cushy/cozy factor of our bed add to the draw. Phil brings me coffee every morning and once I've sipped the last drop I have enough oomph to get going, but at some point I'm back to sitting on the bed during the day...(don't judge me too much...remember the pathetic no furniture bit)...working, reading, snuggling the boy, internetting. Honestly, it's just been so long since I've had a space of my own that if I wasn't too busy enjoying it I'd be doing a happy dance all day. Alright, time to FOCUS. And here's to chapter 4...



P.S. I hope you all are doing fantastic...not in the you-have-every-thing-you-want-comfortable-life kind of fantastic...but more of a challenged-and-growing-learning-inspired-pressing-on-no-matter-what fantastic. There's a big difference. Love you guys and have a good one!

- Esther

10 Dangerous Ways to Find Our Identities

The great question - who am I? 

 We all need to know that we are special. We are desperately looking and latching on to anything that seems to single us out. The truth is, our identity rests in one thing and one thing only, our Creator. We are designed by a loving, all knowing God as an unique, individual, amazing person with a purpose. Once we get this, we can begin to truly embrace who we are and be strong and confident in our identity.

I have really been struggling with my own identity, having fallen into the trap of trying to define who I was by shallow, changeable things. Then, when as often as not, my "false identity" crumbled around me I had a bit of an "identity crises". Yikes!
Thankfully God used this Great Awakening to encourage me to really be raw and real about everything. Here are some of the things I mistakingly believed made me ME.

TOP FALSE PLACES TO FIND IDENTITY

1) emotions

Always happy, thoughtful or grumpy, it is easy to grasp onto this one, though just as easy to lose. One of the many problems with this, one life changing, hormonal experience and I was no longer "me".
2) appearance
Pretty obvious, we are always striving to fit in (or not fit in) with our style choices. I have had to be careful that my own style is an extension of my true identity not a mask I hide behind.
3) talents
Playing the piano and being obsessed with home design is awesome, but it is not who I am. I am a unique child of God and my different talents are evidence of that. However, if all my abilities were taken away, I would still be the person who made that talent possible.
4) hobbies
Doing what we enjoy is super important, but it is not necessary to be who we are. Hobbies and activities make us happy because they remind of who we were designed to be and create an outlet for expression.
5) occupation
This is so difficult for me. Because I really wanted my job to define who I am and honestly, it wasn't. Instead of stressing, I had (and have) to realize that I do not need to depend on what I do to define who I am.
6) age
As stupid as this is, without thinking we use our age group to define who we are "I am in my twenties so I do such and such". It is wonderful and part of life to embrace each stage of life and it's possibilities. I just have to watch myself to make sure I do not get stuck in a decade and freak out when it is over. We are so much more than that.
7) friends and family
Who we spend the most time with shapes our lives, no doubt about it. However loved ones come and go. Who we are is a lasting reality that never changes, in that we will always be image bearers of our Creator and designed to serve Him and others with our special and unique gifts and talents.
8) our spouse
Marriage exposes our true selves to another person, sometimes we cannot take it when our spouse pushes away the "identity masks" we have put on and shows us who is really behind it all. It made me feel naked, stripped of the cozy layers of "who I was". Instead of shying away, I had to embrace this unveiling and praise God and thank my hubby for being so kind and gentle as when he pointed things out.
9) lifestyle
We tend to look at others around us and play a big "compare to the Jones'" game. Having the life of luxury and travel does not create happiness or sophistication nor does a simple self sustaining homestead make anyone holier or understanding. Lifestyles change and so do our wants, needs and desires. I have to be sure that I remain true to what really matters, being right where God wants me to be!
10) the past
I saved this for last because it is important and possibly one of the most dangerous identity shapers I cling to. My past, past joys, sorrows, friends and loved ones now gone, rosy summers, cozy winters, all the memories that I carry around. They can be comforting, even the bad ones, because they help me explain to myself who I am and why.
The danger is, if I look to my past to define who I am, then I will become nothing more than a shadow. A memory of the person that was. No need to relive memories to find who I am, that person is still there! Perhaps buried under years of neglect but there and waiting to live now. This is what it is all about, finding 
ourselves by finding our Creator and sharing His love and truth with others. Loving Him now, using our talents now, embracing life now, working hard now, sharing our passions now, living now.

To the moon and back,
Ashley @realethereal

Nomad Life: my top 5 take-aways

I haven't really shared very much about what's been going on with us the past 2 years and I'm realizing I really need to open up more about what we're up to and why we're doing it. The following is a little glimpse into our life and some of the lessons I've been learning - good? Good.

It's been over a year and a half since we left our home practically overnight. A year and half  ago we took the jump into the land of uncertainty and living day to day wondering what tomorrow holds. Within the first six months we had gotten rid of a majority of everything we owned and had smushed what was left into our car - shoving ourselves into whatever room was left over. Tightly gripping the each other's hand and with eyes wide in anticipation, we headed off into the unknown.

(picture courtesy of Jonathan Zoeteman)

Our journey started way back before we ever thought of leaving Wisconsin. It was a series of things that brought us to the ever growing realization that God had other plans for us. Everything from verses we'd mull over, books we'd read and conversations we'd have -  even putting us in a house with mold. Mold which not only made me sick, but forced us to get rid of our belongings.  which in turn made us much more flexible and even more ready for change.

Sometimes God would prick us softly and sometimes with gut wrenching force - but in His perfect plan He kept making it more and more evident that the feelings and thoughts we had were part of His way of leading us where we needed to be.

And as much as the future wasn't perfectly spelled out, we took a leap of faith and yes we've had our moments, but nothing could be more comforting than knowing you're doing what you've been called to.

The blessings of this season have been too many to list. As a family our eyes have soaked in some of the most incredible sites America has to offer.  We've encountered some of the most uplifting and inspiring people - many of whom we now call friends. And, you want to talk about togetherness? My word. We've taken it to a whole 'notha level. There has only been a handful of days Phil and I have been apart since we've been married and I wouldn't have it any other way. Our son has become a seasoned traveller, a lover of coffee shops, "friends," and any type of water and mountains. It's been a blast.

However, I'd be lying if I didn't put it out there that there's also been a lot of not so pretty moments. Moments where I felt like I had nothing left. Just fried. Running on empty. Realizing you gotta' get it together and wondering how in the world you're going to be able to. It wasn't just me. Phil had his bad days too.

Times where all we wanted was just a little bit of clarity. Moments where we craved the security of our own space and the comfort of our own bed. Wondering what was coming next. Good thing the dips were short lived and usually ended with us in a big family group hug - which is pretty good stuff. Of course this is a super condensed, abridged version. What's important is that the good and the bad in all these times have been equally important in the making of our story. Life would be pretty boring if there were only just ups, right?

Here's my top 5 take-aways from our nomadic life:

1. Learn what you can live without. We can live without more than we think and then some (or a then a lot), and it's way too easy to re-aquire stuff along the way.

2. Expect the unexpected. The only thing we're 100% sure of is that everything is gonna' be alright and that we are not in control. 

3. Don't over romanticize this or any other lifestyle. Being able to have this type of flexibility and freedom comes with a price. (i.e. when Philip got poison oak at the same time I got some sort of crazy flu thing where we ended up crashing in a hotel in L.A. for several days (think $$$) wishing we didn't have to leave but needing to get on the road. IT WAS NOT PRETTY YOU GUYS. Read: awful pain and agony, nails on a chalkboard feeling. But ya' know, it's over. Thank you Jesus.

4. Embrace the closeness. The Phils' are my best friends. I can't tell you how thankful I am for the season of happily nomadic living we've experienced together. Little Phil might not remember many of the details, but I can already see how these times have shaped and molded his little, or not so little, personality.

5. Find joy. Don't put joy off until the journey is over. One day will be here sooner than you think and the last thing you want is to look back and regret not enjoying the journey. I'm constantly reminding myself to relax and soak in these moments - to be excited for the in-between stages, not wish them away for what I think could be the "destination."

(photo courtesy of Matt Zoeteman)

To the moon and back,
Esther

we hold the keys

Every generation has their own unique pros & cons. I think of the generation that travelled west in covered wagons and can only praise God for the grit and determination that those crazy and incredible people had. Kudos to you if you disagree, but generally speaking I simply don't see many of us from the millennial generation being capable of those same feats (even if we do wear the same hats). Yet, we do have our own paths to forge, we're making our way through a whole new world of technology and an information filled age that will require just as much courage.

I love so many of the defining qualities that I see God working into the fiber of our current generation - especially when it comes to our force in the marketplace and the creative arts - (not to mention our smiling faces on all forms of social media). It's an amazing age we live in and we can all be excited for the unlocked potential that we hold the keys to.

Though as I'm thinking about the opportunities and privileges of our generation, I am also aware of the responsibility and danger of this all too instant world in which we live. We live in an "easy" generation.

Everything is at our fingertips.

It is easy to do something well, yet it is also just as easy to do something poorly.
It is easy to be kind, easy to be unkind.
Easy to communicate quickly and often, but also super easy to offend and step on toes.
It is easy to be open and frank but also all to easy to portray a life other than our own.
Easy to be a cyber bully but think it is okay because we used a "winky smiley" at the end or a forgiving "haha."

In conclusion. Here's 5 reminders I'm constantly reminding myself of:

1. It's easy to always have to have an opinion. It's hard to know when to voice it and when not to.

2. Make sure you're picking and choosing your battles wisely. There are many causes worth your time and energy, pray that God would use your gifts and unique voice for things that matter.

3. Be gracious. Your expectations shouldn't be the benchmark for others.

"Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person." - Colossians 4:6

4. Don't purposefully take things out of context or twist words. For example, so many times the "don't gossip" card is pulled it is done in a spirit of superiority or self righteousness.

5. Check your heart. Is my "boldness" glorifying God or myself? Am I putting Christ and others first or my own views and amazing ability to out reason others? 

We're blessed with amazing technology and a google answer for every question ever asked, we have a huge responsibility. It is in our hands. 

Given so much, we must now give to others.

To the moon and back,
Ashley + Esther